Forgive me Father for I have sinned.
Not against the Divine.
Not against vows.
But against the ordinary.

I have sinned,
Because my lungs still agree with me,
Because my tongue still twists,
Because my cords still carry sound,
Because my heart did not ask him before it kept going.

I confess,
I assumed he would remain,
I assumed he would wake up
As the Sun does,
Without interruption,
Without negotiation.
I have mistaken continuity
For certainty.

Forgive me Father,
Forgive me…
I still find him occupying every silence,
I still hear his name in every incomplete sentence.

I confess,
The doors are still opening,
Sidewalks are still walked on,
Sun still rises and sets
Time still moves on
As I do.

Forgive me,
For I was too busy becoming tomorrow
While he was already turning into memory.

I have sinned,
Not because of his death
But because of my survival.

I ask for absolution,
Because I lived
And he died.

Forgive me,
For taking it for granted
Then mourning it like a little child.

Forgive me Father for I have sinned
And never confessed.

Amen.